


sorry

by osakiss



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Angst with Sad Ending, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Needs a Hug, Established Relationship, M/M, Suicide, blood bath, lots of sobbing, lowkey sorry for this venty mess dhghjs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-22
Updated: 2019-10-22
Packaged: 2020-12-28 16:09:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21139457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/osakiss/pseuds/osakiss
Summary: Virgil checks his messages later than he would've wished.





	sorry

**Author's Note:**

> hello hi this deals with suicide so if youre uncomfy and havent read the tags for whatever reason pls exit now love

Virgil blinks lazily, his eyes out of focus. It’s way too early to try to make sense of anything, but Virgil knows if he doesn’t get up now then Janus would shove the blankets off him. Oh, how he hated getting the blankets shoved off. Janus hates it himself, being pretty much part reptilian at this point with how much he loves the warmth, so it further pisses off Virgil whenever his boyfriend does it to him.

He rubbed his eyes and slowly sat up. Stretching, he yawned and rubbed his eyes once more. Virgil took a look at his phone on the nightstand and decided to check the time. The device read _ 07:21 AM _. Virgil flopped back onto his bed and grabbed his phone off the nightstand. 

_ 18 new messages from **jan**_ **_♡ _ **

Virgil’s brow furrowed in confusion. Janus usually didn’t send that many messages, if any at all really. But he checks them anyway. 

_[4:36] _

**_jan ♡_ **

_hey v_

_i just really need to get this off my chest_

_i'm sorry_

_i'm so fucking sorry_

_for everything_

_by everything i mean everytime i messed up_

_arguing with you, being an asshole, and just being a shitty person_

_im sorry that i just couldnt be. worth you._

_you're more than i could ever ask for and i honestly dont deserve you_

_i never did haha_

_i may not be deserving of the love i have for you but i still have it_

_i really do love you_

_i love you so much virgil_

_sorry for bothering you so much_

_i just want you to know im sorry for what i've done and will do, and that i dont want to hurt you_

_i love you so much virgil i just think youre better off without me okay_

_take care. make sure to eat healthy, drink water, and not sleep as late as you usually do. _

_i will always love you, my stormcloud_

Virgil’s tears were falling on his phone as he finished that last message. He could read between the lines, he knew exactly what Jan was implying but was praying that it wasn’t what he thought it was. Virgil threw his phone back to his bed and rushed to get dressed before running out of his house. His black jacket was hanging off his shoulder, his mind set on checking on Janus. He barged into his boyfriend’s apartment and checked everyone for him, the first being his bedroom. 

Virgil was terrified. Last night his boyfriend was acting off, but Virgil didn’t want to pressure him into talking about it, rather telling him he loves him and giving him the space Virgil thought he needed. He fears that had the opposite effect of what was intended, and now the worst has happened. 

His heart was beating so fast. Virgil was sure everyone could feel it. It felt so heavy. Pounding and pounding, ringing in his ears. Adrenaline guiding him everywhere. Virgil kept his frantic search. The bedroom was a no-go. He was so scared. He didn’t want to see Janus in pain, but if he could do something to help him he’d risk it. A sudden thought went into Virgil’s mind. The bathroom. He hasn’t checked there yet.

Virgil sprinted back into Janus’ room, tripping on the books scattered but keeping his balance and grabbing onto the bathroom’s handle. Turning it, he entered.

Virgil walked down slowly, the anxiety ringing. Something was amiss. He was forgetting something. When was Janus’ message sent? What time did he wake up? Did he even have the time to save Janus, or would he never have been able to? 

Virgil turned his head to see Janus lying in the bathtub filled with his own blood, a relaxed smile expressed on his face.

He couldn’t stop screaming. Virgil wasn’t sure who heard him, if anyone else was there, he couldn’t bring himself to care. He crashed down to the floor, his anguished sobbing wracking his entire being. Virgil curled in on himself, his chest heaving. He couldn't breathe. Snot was running down along with salty tears as he rocked himself forward and back. Nothing could stop the ache Virgil felt.

Janus was gone. _ Gone. _


End file.
